JUNE 18, 2010

Snow White

by Sholina Jivraj

A couple of weeks ago, I woke up in the morning remembering a very vivid dream.  I was walking across a walkway near a condo.  Someone asked me to look up into one of the apartments to admire the bathroom which had a Snow White and 7 Dwarfs theme.  The toilette was the queen’s throne and a dwarf was standing there holding towels.  For the life of me, I couldn’t figure out what this was about.  I told a couple of friends (including my dear friend, Annabelle) about it and none of us could understand why I remembered it so strongly.  The next day, I went to see Annabelle.  We were having coffee when we felt the presence of her late husband.  Belle thought it was strange that he would appear OUTside when he usually makes his presence INside.  I immediately felt the house needed a clearing.  As I finished that, I felt I needed to go inside.  I was guided to go upstairs and stood right in front of Belle’s daughter’s room.  I entered the room and immediately knew that something had to go – but what?  Right at that moment, the closet door slowly opened with a creek.  I went back towards the stairs and called Annabelle to come upstairs right away.  I told her that her daughter had something in the closet – a gift – a plush toy actually – that absolutely needed to go.  But as we looked for the toy, I happened to look up and to the top right corner to find figurines of Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs!!  I pointed them out to Belle.  We looked at each other in amazement because now we were both remembering the dream!  I asked her what was under the figurines in the golden box.  She said they were cards that her daughter had received – a keepsake.  I needed her to open it.  There were no cards in the box.  There was, however, Annabelle’s tiara and sacred candles from her wedding.  This was a huge sign from her husband that we were onto something, and that he was definitely the one who was giving me this information.  I looked up again and noticed a big envelope.  When I asked Belle what was inside, she said “Oh my God, there are several Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs antique, original pictures in there – over 40 years old!”  I opened the envelope to make sure there wasn’t something else in there we were supposed to find, but there wasn’t.  We realized that when we received several messages from her late husband over the past couple of months that he was sending her money but had no idea how.  THIS WAS IT!  Belle said she would get the pictures appraised and sell them.  We were amazed at how quickly this was uncovered and so happy to have found the pictures. 

But the story doesn’t end here.  I spoke to Belle again the next day and she told me that the same night we found the pictures, she went back into her daughter’s room to find the toy that “had to go”.  We were so excited about the whole Snow White situation that we had forgotten about the toy!  Sure enough, in the closet she found and old teddy bear given to her by a person from her past – a person who appeared to be of a very negative nature.  As soon as she saw it, she knew it had to go.  She wrapped it up and threw it out.

The reason why I’m sharing this with you is to encourage you to use your inner wisdom.  We all have intuition.  It may be a kind and gentle voice in your head.  It could be a feeling in your gut.  It could just be an unexplained knowing.  Belle used her intuition to guide her back to the closet and remove the negativity in her daughter’s room.  Our Spirit Guides and Angels are always whispering guidance in our ears.  They always sound gentle, positive, and loving.  Although these beings have no judgment and no attachment to your choice of listening to them or not, they are most happy if you let them serve you.  Conscious living means opening your mind, ears, eyes, and heart and allowing yourself to be gifted by the messages of the Divine.

In love and light,

Sholina

To live in guilt is to use up your present moments being immobilized over what has already transpired. Wayne Dyer

APRIL 2010:

The Verdict: Not Guilty

by Sholina Jivraj

What purpose does guilt play in our lives?  Some would say that it helps us realize right from wrong.  Maybe guilt makes us “put the other person first”.  Or perhaps it helps us change our negative behaviour into that which is more kind and loving; and as we are more kind and loving, we feel good about ourselves as human beings.  If this is true, then in the end: guilt makes us feel good about ourselves as human beings.  Really?  Because generally when I feel guilty, I feel like crap!  I feel low in energy.  I tend to eat more.  I become withdrawn, sad, and I may cry.  Even worse (and I can speak for many people here), when guilt turns into shame, I feel like I am a “bad” person, I don’t feel good enough, and my self-esteem becomes low.

No matter which way you slice it, guilt is a fear-based emotion and is seriously unhealthy.  Can you honestly take back something that you have already done (or not done)?  And even if you could (after the fact) would it really change the feelings of others involved?  Maybe, maybe not.  But your feelings of guilt remain with you forever (even as you think back to the event).  Until… you release the negative emotion.  (And it’s important to note here that if you have done everything in your power to change the situation and have expressed how sorry you are, the response from the other person is irrelevant.  Holding onto grudges and resentments is a matter of free-will and choice.)

Just recently I experienced something rather strange.  I woke up one morning with four spider bites on my neck.  It was itchy – that was the only symptom.  About an hour later, I received some disturbing news that I really didn’t expect or want to hear.  Within thirty-five minutes, the nodes in my neck became so swollen and my earlobe doubled in size – infection had set it.  At the same time, I was getting throbbing pain in the neck and on the left side of my head which lasted for days.  So I asked myself over and over: “What does this all mean?”  I realized that the physical symptoms were a manifestation of something I didn’t want to hear (and since ears are also about “balance” I could tell my life was out of balance somewhere).  And because I was feeling irrational guilt for something else that was occurring in my life, the sharp pains were manifestation of “pangs of guilt”.  Anything that causes you pain (especially chronic) is an indication that you feel guilt.  It took about two days to realize why I was feeling guilty, and another two to release it.  Then I started to feel better.  I have been through many years of undeserved, illogical guilt (ingrained in me through the womb).  I’ve done much work to take back my power deflect the subconscious need to feel that emotion more often than not.  Yet clearly, my body is telling me I still feel this negative emotion, so much so that it quickly manifests physically.  This is why I felt the urge to write this article.

Let me share a different story.  About a month ago, I had a client who was experiencing guilt around her sexual desires.  She is a beautiful and sensual woman who was just tapping into her inner goddess at that point in her life – a very significant and rewarding (although sometimes confusing) period in one’s life.  What was there to feel guilty about?  Sex seems to be an area where we tend to feel much guilt because of our misconceptions around it.  Sex can be a beautiful and loving experience between people who connect on more than just the physical level.  However, even if there isn’t a strong connection on a higher level, if the parties involved come together with the same intention, the experience can still be very gratifying.  What purpose does guilt play in this?  Our “learned” negative views around sex do not serve us in any way but to create shame, pain, fear, loneliness, and confusion.  The sexual experience is a way of release, connection, and gratification.  It is a way to learn more about yourself, your body, its function, its desires, it’s pleasures.  Guilt about union, joy, giving and receiving love?  Guilt for something we already ARE (sexual beings) and have a right to (our body’s own function)?  Really?  I hope you see how ludicrous this mentality is as you read this article.

Let me put it this way: If LOVE is the only TRUTH, then isn’t it really an illusion to feel guilt for anything other than intentionally hurting another human being?  How many of us actually say that we LOVE OURSELVES?  Sex and sexuality is a gift of love from God.  It’s already yours if you choose to accept it.  If living, speaking, and experiencing your TRUTH is part of LOVING yourSELF (and it is), then where is the guilt in that?  There isn’t any – except for your illusions of such.  On a conscious level, we are all destined to find and live our TRUTH.  Again, there is no guilt in that.  In fact, doing the OPPOSITE would be hurting and deceiving your TRUE SELF – the human and spiritual being that you are relentlessly denying and torturing – and so THAT, my friends, would be the only reason to feel guilty.

Love yourSELF.

Experience your TRUTH.

Be pain-FREE.

Live JUICY.

Namaste.